Still tryin to feel better........

I am still trying very hard to feel better but I feel like I just don't have control over it sometimes........these are some of the things that help.

A quick update

Hello friends! We want to thank all of you for your kind words and prayers. We are now home from the hospital and are trying to get back to "normal" around here. I am sure soon I will be able to add some new pictures and start posting again. I am slowing working up to it. We plan to brand soon and we are looking forward to that. We have many things to be thankful for.

Sad news

I am sorry to be so impersonal with this news. I realize I have readers that range from family to complete strangers. I made the decision to put this on my blog to avoid having to tell the story nine thousand times. It is just to painful and it is inevitable I will have to tell some people.
Most of you knew about me being pregnant again. We had our first doctor appt. this past Thursday and I knew I was probably even far enough to tell if we were to have a boy or a girl. It was a very devastating day..............the doctor could find no heartbeat. The baby was 17 weeks. I never even imagined hearing that news. We are now waiting for my body to completely miscarry on it's own, if not they have me scheduled at the hospital on Wed. (I may go tomorrow as I just want to move on) to be induced since I was further along. Please forgive me for not calling some of you and telling you ourselves but like I said, I just cannot tell the story a million times.

Jeremy's new ride

Here is Jeremy and Paul modeling the new truck. Jeremy is very tickled with it so far.

Now we just need to get the gooseneck hitch in it.

More lovely trespassers........

It doesn't stop around here even on Easter Sunday of all days when these dirtbags should be in church! Isn't it nice of them to drive on the pasture so they can back their trucks up to the bank to unload their bikes. I am sure that doesn't erode the banks.

Don't you love the license plate? I have seen this one here before. I bet he won't be back!

You boys better start going where it is legal for you to be, things are going to tighten up.
I promise!

Easter Sunday

Here are my angels right before we headed over to the Moonraker Ranch for an Easter egg hunt and potluck feast.

Huntingn eggs, I just love how they stick together and help each other out.

She can run in high heels!

I also love how giving they both are. Steele thought Linda needed an egg too.

I have always though these two were alike. Grumpy, sensitive and cute still. That is Grandpa for those of you that don't know, my dad. They were watching Chuck the owner of the ranch crash his model airplane for the second time.

Better pics of the filly

Here is a little better picture of the cute little one. I can't wait to get to play with her. We really try and leave them alone for a few weeks or so. We don't need to interfere with the mares mothering. I want to, but don't need to. You can't really see her legs in this picture but she has two white socks on the hind legs. She sticks right next to her momma. There is no funny business like our domestic horses. Survival is staying by mom.

Easter filly

This is the wild mare and her new baby. I woke up and looked out the window and told Jeremy I thought I saw little legs, he didn't believe me. I love it when I am right! Jeremy and I really think her name should be Easter but I guess it will be up to Paul. What a sweet surprise she was! The sun hadn't quite come up when I took these so later I will try and get some better one.

Flowers

This is a picture of the flowers we brought to the service for the baby today. We were running late getting going this morning because I had slept in after getting up in the middle of the night and watching tv for way too long before finally falling asleep again.

I totally wanted to get the biggest, most beautiful bouquet of flowers for them from the local florist but that was not in the cards so we went to plan B and we felt better about it in the end. The family knew exactly who they were from and we had our hearts in it. We had to drive a bit farther up the mountain on the way out to get them and then really put the the hammer down to get to town in time but we loved it. It was a nice service even if I still can't make too much sense of a tiny blue casket................they sang Amazing Grace and a few other touching songs. I really lost it when I saw the pictures of Sage and Steele holding him..........

I have had enough for today and must close my eyes.............

I really need a shower!

I am sorry about more darn cow pictures............I need a pick me up after the crazy day we have all had. This picture makes me happy. The beautiful clouds, piles of calves everywhere in the sunshine, and fat happy cows.

So this morning Jeremy was up and at em before the sun was even up and I was........well, I was sleeping darn it. The kids were happily sleeping so so was I. Anyway back to my story.........I hear the familiar sound of his boots on the stairs and I am trying to decide whether to pretend I am asleep and then fling my eyes open at the last minute and scare the crap out of him or just try and be sweet and say good morning "normally". He usually comes back up to the house to fill his coffee cup and then will come upstairs and say good morning, I love it when he does and for some reason always want to be playful and onery. ( I just asked him how to spell onery and he said B-R-A-N-D-I-E, how rude) Back to the story for the second time..... Before he even gets to the top I hear him say "baby, I need your help". I IMMEDIATLEY fly out of bed hoping he says it is a calf that needs pulled or something to that effect. But you know that tone of voice when you know it is worse than that. He says "I dislocated my shoulder again". My hands fly to my face "NO!" Oh yeah, he sure enough had. I say "I gotta pee before I can do anything" and run downstairs as fast as I could trying not to barf. So I get back up and say "are you really sure you want me to try and put it back?!?!" Yes was the answer darn it. The doctors had gone over with me how to do it back when he originally dislocated it a year ago. Do you think I remembered?! Nope, I had hoped and prayed I wouldn't ever have to. It is only 7am when this took place so I am trying to figure out what to do when I can't get it done. I was so afraid to hurt him worse...........ugh. I called Jim and Linda up to ask her about it and had she ever done it. She was a nurse all her life, now retired. She says well I haven't but come over and we will try and at least that way you are closer to the doctor. Doctor...........that souded good to me! So we drag the kids out of bed and throw them in the car. I barely remember to brush my teeth, forgetting deoderant and a bra of all things.......
Jeremy had been getting ready to trim my horse Cody when it happened so we had to get his halter off before we left. He had reached through the fence to get a tool and that is how it dislocated. Not even a good war story. So we were heading out and I had some tylenol in the glove box and I thought he had better take some just to help when I spot the muscle relaxers that the smartest woman on earth, Sallie had given us awhile back. So we had him take them too to help relax the muscles. What a great help that turned out to be! We get to Jim and Linda's and they try without success. Jim feeds the kids for me while I am still wanting to toss my cookies. I think I am getting soft! I had grabbed the phone book before leaving home and was calling the Urgent care and the doctors offices. None of them opened til 9am! We knew if we went to the ER they would just leave us sitting til well after that anyway so by now it was 8:20am so we just loaded up the kids and we headed to our family doctor figuring we would be there by the time they opened. Linda followed us in her car so she could watch and know how to do it next time. We get to the doctors office and the doctor wasn't due in til 10:30am!!!!! The nurse is the coolest ever and she said "I can't touch you but if she (Linda) wants to do it I will talk her through it" So back they went and got it done! It was so funny, you could hear the nurse screaming cause she was so happy Linda got it done. We also think that is where the muscle relaxers really helped cause by then they had really kicked in. I told Jeremy he was going to have to walk the rest of the way to the doctor if he didn't stop singing and trying to dance in the car on the way. Those things make you goofy! Once his shoulder is put back he feels so much better of course so since we were already in town we ran a bunch of errands and finally got home just a bit ago. Where does the shower come in you ask? Well, I really needed one yesterday but was so tired and not really feeling well (I have been having alot of cramps and pain, I am sure it is stress) so I didn't get it done. I thought, I'll get in in the morning..............you can bet the minute my feet hit the front door tonight my butt was in the shower!

On another note, to help explain the stress I mentioned earlier we found a new truck. It is an incredible deal and we really really need a truck. We have been basically without for about two years now. Everytime we have to haul anything we have had to borrow Sid and Sallie's truck and while they are happy to do it and we are very grateful to have that option, we really need our own. The problem has been of course money and not being able to get another vehicle loan. If we traded in our Jeep then we could have but we really think it would be a good idea to keep the Jeep too so that we are not tearing up a truck on this road we live on. This truck we found happens to be a great deal and to spare a long detailed story we have some wonderful friends that are helping out and we are going to look at it on Friday and hopefully if it checks out we will bring it home. But needless to say I am stressing that business will continue and we will be able to make our bills. I need to learn to let go...............God will provide I know but it feels like we are not taking enough responsibility on our own if I let go completely...............

As if this post isn't long enough and the world is not spinning enough............we have a funeral to attend tommorrow. I can hardly write about it, it is so awful............
The gal that watches the kids for us sometimes has a beautiful little girl that Steele says he is going to marry when he grows up. She had a handsome baby boy a few months ago. God must have needed another angel and now the baby is back with Him. My heart aches for our gal (the babies mother, I just don't feel right mentioning their names but most of you probably know who I am talking about). Please be praying for the family. I can't even imagine the pain they are feeling.

Flying kites

My handsome little rascal. He was giving me the "cheese". He was really enjoying what he was doing so I got a smile instead of the scowl.

He had a Thomas the Train kite and it was a good one, flying real good for him. Sage on the other hand had a butterfly that was not flying so good. She was really having to work to keep it in the air. Daddy heard all the squeals and couldn't resist the urge to come and play. This was just after he got it in the air again and was running for cover cause the darn thing kept nose diving. You can see it to the right of the tree. I just loved the clouds blowing in over the mountains. You can always tell a storm and rain because the wind will come out of the south. Any other time it will blow out of the north.

She is so darn silly. She was cracking up cause Daddy was holding his head in hopes he didn't get hit with the kite. I HAVE to stop lauughing when he gets hurt. mental note "it is rubbing off on the kids" I will remember now.......

My little professional. He finally lost interest since it was flying so easily and headed toward the house and got the darn thing stuck in the tree. He headed down the driveway on his tractor to help Daddy feed. I wish I would have gotten a picture of him leaving on his tractor but I was a bit busy getting the kite out of the tree.

The beloved Lodge again.......

This is another old building in White Oak just up the mountain from us. I can't remember the whole story since I rely on Jeremy for the history stuff but there is something about Joaquin Murrieta staying here once.

The view is from the back of the house.

The picture below is the back side of the Lodge.

This is the view from the front. I just love this old building.

Someday maybe I will serve coffee and donut to the locals and actually get to see the lace curtains blowing in the windows.....

New calves

Are you sick of seeing cows yet?

This one is a bit older. I wish he wouldn't have been stealing the show. The one behind him was very cute.
Ah and this sweet girl is Horny and her brand spanking new one. She did us proud a heifer. Jeremy got out of the car and was going to go lift up it's tail. I sure wish I would have videoed me heckling him and watching Horny shake her head at him the minute he opened the car door. She doesn't mess around when she has a calf. Can't you just see it in her face?!

I just love it when they are black and warm from the sun.....

I took this picture just because of how pretty the brand is. Can you see it?

A first time heifer and her calf. We didn't even think she was pregnant.

Friday

You know, now that I think about it, these pictures weren't actually taken on Friday. Because if they were poor naked Steele would have pnemonia. The wiind blew so darn hard on Friday I think the house is now 6 ft to the south.

Gotta love that darn blind pony.

Jeremy and his filly Itchy. We have turned out several of the horses which also means nine million gates to open. She just happens to be the first one in your face everytime too. She loves to be near you and be scratched. I am not sure what is with a certain someone's face...........most likely cause I was pointing the camera again.

Making deviled eggs.

This is my girl. She helped me make deviled eggs the other day.

She was very proud of herself. I love that I can have her do it by herself someday. We will be so productive!
Some little boy was trying to steal the show the rascal. He did a good job of eating them. And boy oh boy, you do not want to be sleeping next to him the night after he eats deviled eggs!
Bleck!

Wordless Wednesday.........